Twilight Blues: Colorful?

Weeks into the Twilight hype, I watched its film with much persuasion from my cousin. She practically bribed me with dinner and free movie, and a night over, to watch the movie with her. For some reason, she's counting how many times she could watch the film with the same tingling feeling.

This tingling feeling I didn't get to feel.

Hear me out. I never read the book before the film, and I never felt the necessity or the curiosity to even borrow a copy. People have been asking that I read it, and watch it, and feel like a school girl. Erm, I never really had that feeling, being a school girl with giggles and blushes and boyfriends and BADUY love lines. That says it all.

But neither the film nor the books (I've read them after having seen the film), made me look back into my high school years and feel like the ultimate school girl.

The ups and downs.

Down: The story was too common and too cheesy. TOO CHEESY!!!!! ew

Up: I love the score. The musical score and OST were perfect for the scenes. Love "Bella's Lullaby". I applaud Carter Burwell for composing the score.

Up: James and Carlisle are more beautiful. Sorry Edward fans. PLUS! They are closer to my age, hay....wahahaha...maybe that's why....

Down: The book portrayed Bella to be quite a walking emotionally overdosed teen. But the actress was a little too bland in comparison.

Down: Bella's friends were too typical...too weird...too common...where the hell is the essense! (ehem ehem...calm down)

Down: The film took out a lot of scenes from the book that would have given Edward and Bella more essense into their relationship. That's why it was kinda disappointing that the film went that way....

Down: The line "I'm sorry...I shouldn't have brought you here" broke the serious moment

Down: The line "Take care of my heart...you have it.." Pure BS!!!!! MS!!!!!!!!

Up: Alice is cute. That much I could give credit for. I love how she speaks.

Up: Charlie's actor was perfect for the role.

Down: Where did all the conversations go? Lot's of loopholes.

Down: Sharkboy was kinda distracting (thanks, ate, for pointing that out, it kinda ruined my indifference to the characters). Jacob would have been beautiful as well if you just forget for a moment that he was sharkboy.

Down: Speaking of which, ate made a lot of points and trivias. She was my footnotes while i watched the film.

Up: Love the vampire snarling...although ate called it hissing...

Up: Clean graphics. Uber love the graphics.

Down: Except when Edward was running while carrying Bella. C'mon, it looked like he was running on a treadmill and the background was a rolling backdrop--with an industrial fan in front of them.

Down: the tree climbing would have been cute, if Edward looked like he was really touching the tree instead of caressing it.

Up: Love the tree scene though. That was when Burwell's "Bella's Lullaby" played. adik. (what can i say, piano instrumentals are my weakness)

Down: the author was there (thanks, ate, for pointing that out) grr

Down: Bella should have been the cook in Charlie's home, as said in the book. It would have shown a more in-depth relationship between them. While I was watching the film, I was kinda surprised that she cared so much about him. I didnt see the bond she has with her dad.

Down: Emmette looked like a body builder on steriods

Down: Jasper had a shifty portrayal in his character. The changes were too dynamic to be real (compare: meeting with the family, baseball game, and burning of James)--really different

Down: Rosalie should have been prettier--as promised by the book--like super model, not bitchy

Down: I judge a book by its cover. the book cover AND TITLE told me that it's mysterious. It's thick and is worth reading. Right! What???

Down: Edward should have perfect teeth in the film. It was his ultimate weapon (the smile that weakened Bella, and the bite! haller!)

Up: But I have a weakness for gorgeous eyes. I would not have looked too long at his teeth! (wahahaha) But when I see James or Carlisle, why should I look at Edward? (un un eh!)

Down: Edward should have been the most beautiful Cullen there, as expressed by the book. Right....

These are just some of my thoughts...I have raved about it since I've seen the film. Note that I'm not the biggest fan, and these are just MY OBSERVATIONS. Don't get angry with me. It's just my opinion from what I have read and seen. I've read lots of romance novels as well, so it is not the first time that I went through a love story. Twilight is just not one of those that made me fall in love with the story, characters...

I'm not a fan, but I appreciate the effort. Not my kind of reading material either. but i read it anyway just to find the big deal. 

What brought the hype? Well, let's just say hypes don't really get to me either.

So Twilight might have been the biggest hit movie of the year, but it would not have been the first to have failed to hit me.

Fine Line

Being a Woman of color, over weight, with curly hair, wearing glasses, barely-there social life, and often eccentric thinking, I have been looked at with those scrutinizing pair of eyes far too much that I recognize it before the offender does. Yeah, we tend to offend others without even realizing it. But I have been in the receiving end far too long.

Gender wise, I am a straight woman. But because of how I think and how I carry myself, I have been mistaken for a lesbian. The male rendition of a lesbian, more specifically. So I tried to change my image. I changed how I dress and speak, but my line of thinking remains the same. With that, I was asked if I was a bisexual, twice from different circles of acquaintances.

I was quick to deny it.

Without thinking that I might have offended those who are lesbians and bisexual, my quick denial was simply due to my resent on how we can't help but judge each other by what we see. We put labels on them and therefore create a stereotype.

With that stereotype falls everything else. In my old office, I have been labeled by my supervisor as "INEXPERIENCED", which lead him to believe that if I have not experienced IT, then I would not be able to understand certain issues that I am very much involved in. My experiences with anything sexual in nature is my only teacher. That is his belief of me. But he has no proof, and he has no idea. He just constantly told me of how I would fail to understand because of my suspected inexperience.

One time, I was in the grocery store and a sales person was offering me baby diapers. Because of how I looked, chubby with my tshirt and shorts, I have been mistaken for a mother with lots of kids.

Do I look like I'm gay? Should I be treated differently because of how I looked? Do I have a third eye blinking on my forehead that allows me to stand out from everyone else?

We are always so judgmental that the fine line between respect and business is blurred.

Rush Us Somewhere Far

When any of my family needs to be rushed to the nearest hospital, the one in Makati with newly renovated wings is not the hospital to be at the top list. Regardless of it being ISO approved, or that the new lobby looks like an airport terminal, or that it can be accessed along Ayala Ave., a wrong diagnosis is a wrong diagnosis.

Nine years ago, I had extreme abdominal pain. I was rushed to their ER. They ran tests, admitted me for a day or two for observation, gave me lots of strong pain relievers, and told me that I merely had stomach cramps and that I should go home. That same evening, with the same abdominal complaint, I was rushed to another hospital.

I was operated on June 13, 1999 and declared that it was a tumor on my right ovary. It was removed along with my appendix, which inflamed due to the mass that protruded against it. It had almost burst and my death would have followed. I was around 12-13 years old.

October 18, 2008, my brother was rushed to the same hospital in Makati because of extreme pain on his right stomach area. He was given a dose of Tramadol and a strong anti acid because they diagnosed that it was Gastritis---a disease common to over weight people, but not very serious.

Two weeks later, on those holidays, he was rushed again to the hospital. It was Saturday at dawn. He was in worse condition. He was hurting more and I felt helpless. My mom was there, too. They gave him Demerol for the pain, ran tests and admitted him. But they didn't do an ultrasound, which was requested because we have a strong risk of having galstones from both parents.

But they said it was a holiday and no one could do the procedure. I just thought that shouldn't it be that there are more people in the hospital because it was a holiday? There are more people outside and emergencies are at higher risks.

My brother endured the pain until Monday, when finally a person could do the ultrasound. They found the family-suspected galstones.

We strongly told the admitting department of our intention to move my brother to a hospital with a doctor who actually cares. It is a very small hospital with interesting wheel chairs. [See my Multiply AccountThe entrance to the ER is the same as the lobby. It looked like a provincial hospital but the doctors and nurses cared.

My brother was operated on yesterday morning. The gal bladder, that is supposed to be the size of a thumb, could almost cover my palm when it was removed from him. It was, according to the doctor, bulok. It was filled with bile, pus and stones. The head surgeon during the procedure allowed my mom and I to look at it before they throw it away.

But before the operation, my brother was crying. There was some blood in his urine. He didn't get to sleep. The further aggravation was due to the pain killers the previous hospital gave him. The Demerol made the gland contract despite the strain it was under. If it burst, there would be hell to pay. I would not have that brother of mine here with us today.

My brother is coming home tomorrow. But the frustration the family feels for the hospital that was certified??? Still here. And it will remain here.

The next time we get rushed for emergencies and stuff, we go to Capitol in QC or to that hospital where my brother was operated on, Mary Chiles in Sampaloc.

After almost 10 years, they were still crappy.

Makati Medical Center is no longer a choice for us. Pang clinics and consultations na lang. No more emergencies rushed there.

Rush us somewhere far. This hospital has failed us too much on emergencies. My brother and I could have died if we did not transfer hospitals. We believed in the hospital, but they failed miserably.

An explanation is no longer necessary. We had enough of them.

I know there are people who have strong faith in the hospital, but transactions with my family will not convince us otherwise. We gave them the chance. We called on them first for help, but then again, the decade in between those instances showed little improvement on quick treatments. The beautiful renovations did not help any.

This is one communication dilemma. How will they convince me and my family that they are still a hospital who cares for the patients?

Lives first? Isn't that the first commandment of being a doctor?

Yeah, name of insurance company?

Otherwise, pick a number.

Sigh.

Injustice.

Reality Bites: Toasted Marshmallow

The "I" as part of an ORGANIZATION.

No, I won't 'philosophize' the existence of a person in an org.

The relationship goes in two ways: the org represents the individual and the individual represents the org.

Sounds rather simple right? But as an ORGCOM major, it is never that simple when you really look at it.

Last Tuesday, we had an exam in MANCOMM. It was the second of two parts. She provided an article about MV Princess of the Stars, which remains as an on-going issue. But the question was not about addressing the external affairs of the issue. Instead, the topic should revolve around the employees of Sulpicio Lines, of which the ship belonged to.

Sure, there was the uproar of the families of the victims. The media focused on every issue they could touch on. But there are other victims, so to speak. The company employees are also concerned in this tragedy. Their lives and work flow will also be affected. They are essentially part of the organization, and everything that revolves around them may break or make them.

I will not venture into detail because I don't know all the information either. As I have mentioned in the previous entries, I don't get to watch news anymore. Instead, what I would like to question is my reaction. I would like to imagine myself as a person who is affected by an issue--as someone who is under the payroll of the org that has an issue.

If I was part of this org...and hell broke lose...where do I stand? Who will I go to? Who will help? When will it be over? When did it begin? What do I do?

Seems like any set of questions to ask in any dilemma. But when I close my eyes, and reimagine myself back in my previous work office, the pictures was definitely ugly. Working underground never looked that pretty to begin with. tsk tsk.

The [ORGCOM] Practice

I'm not really the biggest fan of sitcoms. I barely watch TV recently. Sadly, even the news. The only times I do get to watch TV is when the kasambahays watch the Prime time shows, which I don't enjoy watching. Could have left, right? But the thing is, I'm stuck typing on the computer and the TV they use is but 6 feet away. Even with my earphones on, and the music on loudly into my ear, I hear the TV and their reactions to the slaps and gunshots.

No, this entry would not focus on these shows that I somehow learned to appreciate along with ridicule [sometimes]. But it is not the story line I focus on or who killed the bida. I am more focused on the reactions of the people who do watch them. How do these shows get talked about so much with fans arguing with another group of fans of a different actor or even a different network?

It's amazing how they share the stories behind these sitcoms as if they experienced it in their own lives. The drama, often melodramatic and overrated, never failed to grasp the attention of different generations. When they cry, the audience cry. When they feel anger, the audience is likewise angry.

It is amazing how these feelings are strongly related to them. It was often simple to predict what the actors would say. It was easy to point who the kontrabida was. But it never quite fails to surprise the viewers. Otherwise, you might hear them wholeheartedly saying, "Sabi na siya un, eh. Diba nung isang araw...?" And the story would be retold.

How is this related to ORGCOM? Well, as a student and part time practitioner of the said expertise, it is important to establish a certain relationship. That relationship would be the ultimate channel to get a message sent, misinterpretations aside, to the right receiver. It allows to make the message and the messenger most credible. It also paves the way for growth.

These shows relayed and tugged at the sentimental nature of every Filipino, even those who are hesitant toward local drama like myself. It made a sort of relationship that somehow assures the idea of entertainment truly entertaining.

Practicing ORGCOM aimed to teach us that. A relationship is a bond. We care.

But as an ORGCOM student, I also know their purpose. I see what they are trying to do, at least that is how interpretations and meanings lead me to believe. So the relationship these shows share with me are different with that of those who are die-hard fans. But there is a relationship, nonetheless, and I realized that they were quite successful in that manner.

As an ORGCOM student, I hope to be as influential--not as a person. No, I do not wish to become an icon in showbiz. But in what I can and will do. As we have been told in our classes as well, the point of being in ORGCOM is to be able to influence the different opinions of people and steer them towards more productive thinking. The end goal is ideally called efficiency.

Venturing into ORGCOM is perhaps the best choice for me. I might not excel in all areas of the program, but I know I shine somewhere. With that, I find it really important and practical to complete the degree and achieve my diploma finally. Not just because I want to graduate with a rather unique course or to flaunt a green banner. Instead, I want to continue what the course began in me: A drive to influence for the better. And to practice.

The ORGCOM practice cannot be fully described. Instead, it is to be experienced. Sounds like a Way of Life, right? But somehow, in my life, it is.

Growth

"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." --Maya Angelou

Ads are telling you more that you'd think they are. It is not just a product. It is also an idea. I call it a Seed.

Companies plant it and allow it to grow. Rather, they don't just let it grow, they make sure that it grows.

The recent TV commercial ads that we see might have been propagating different ideas. They show different products. They could be food, milk, instant noodles or even different kinds of services. But they have something in common.

As mentioned by Brad Geiser of GeiserMaclang, that would be a PR campaign. It is not trying to sell just the product. It is trying to change an opinion.

In this regard, the commercials today have highlighted the importance of spending time with your family, especially during meals. Lucky Me had the FaMEALy Day. Nido focused on the relationship between parent and child. McDonald's advocate the same idea. The commercials we see on TV are saying something.

I, for one, loved the FaMEALy ad wherein a kid was having dinner by herself as she relayed the events that happened to her that day. These events included her getting a star for a job well done, and man later approaching her with ulterior motives. The young girl acted as if the stranger was as harmless as the teacher. After seeing the commercial for the first time, I was really nervous.

I had goosebumps, which was a rare thing for me. Whoa.

It was so moving that you just want every kid to experience as much happiness as they could without the worry over threats to their lives and any kind of pain. I had the urge to take the girl, shake her to her senses, and hug her till she gets my point. But she was not my kid. I don't have kids.

That was how strong it was for me.

Ads are not usually as strong, at least PR campaigns are not. But being in the field of communication, you get to point these out without the other people knowing. It was a subtle manipulation of their opinions. Filipinos are getting more inclined to family oriented shows and commercials. I guess advertisers realized the need to reformat the thinking of many Filipinos with regards to families and families eating together for lunch.

It was just a seed. It was an idea, and someone believed in it. They believed that we should likewise believe in the importance of being with your family. It is of general interest really, and it was never attacked that way--as far as I know (I'm not all knowing).

Getting to watch ads of similar light gives you the warm and fuzzy feeling. Despite the other problems that bombard the country today, at least the focus of these ads to help maintain the founding group: the family.

Kuno Ad: Chocolate Cupcakes

This is a photo I have taken of my Cupcakes. I call t Kuno Ad. As sweet as it looks like, it also appears amateur-ish. But what can you expect from a baking outburst--aka, sudden need to bake. With my 12 cupcakes and a simple point and shoot cam, I took pictures from different angles as if the cakes were live models who can twist and turn, and smile. I used natural lighting, no flash. I used the basic principles I learned from school. I wanted to share the delight these cakes promised--flatly (image compression, wahahaha).

But this photo could have fooled anyone. I mean, it seems classy enough because it seems like a "saucy" product. The angle, the depth of field effect and the shadow play seemed to make it richer than it actually is.

But isn't that what many ads and commercials do to us? They make us believe that their product is the best there is in their industry and we are as gullible as they make us out to be. Well, that's putting it harshly. But a skeptic would seem to percieve it that way.

Communication seems to be a too profound a word to describe what is going on around us, especially in the market. To non communication majors, ads would just seem to share with them new products and new ideas. Little would they have known that they are already being manipulated to buy the item and to bite the idea.

It would have taken an entire research team to get you to believe the ad, more so just seeing it. They will blast it through websites, the radio, print, and especially the TV. It would have taken loads of budget support, resource materials, graphic design, photographic expertise, marketing skills, sales dividends, and the right attitude to produce one ad--and for the people to believe that ad.

But it could have also taken one me to mimic what they are doing and be as successful. That would be a miracle. But I can gather small crowds, and that is the beginning. Sometimes, the best ads are not all full blast implementation and postage on every wall. Baby steps are often better.

In the business, on the other hand, fast action is always called for. Research is most needed to do not only the fastest job, but also the most efficient. So my photographs MIGHT call someone's attention. But there is no assurance regardless of my academic and practical training from the University. A team's effort would most probably even make my efforts seem futile to say the least.

But they did taste great in the end anyway...that is my opinion against theirs though.

The Power at Our Finger Tips

We always take advantage of the fact that there is much power at out finger tips. It is called a keyboard. It takes different shapes and different sizes. Technology of its different designs can truly amaze a person when you look at it. It has keys representing numbers and letters that makes up words and different codes. It appears mostly on PCs and mobile phones.

Unleashed. That is what we can call this device made of different buttons and keys. It has such great power and utility and we do use it almost everyday--at least to those people who are quite dependent on one. Admittedly, I am one of them.

As an individual with such dependency on modern technology, communication devices such as computers and mobile phones are perhaps the best technology ever invented. AND, I am not even referring to the top of the line designs. A Nokia 3210 or a Pentium II CPU would have done wonders. Well, they did wonders, which lead to the kind of technology we conveniently have at the palm of our hands.

Recently, my mom opened an over-dinner question. Someone asked in her office, what was the thing you would miss the most when the electricity dies due to unforeseen predicaments? Many answered TV, mobile phones, radio [drama], and the AC. My, oh, my. I am a geek for I answered the PC is my life. Not only do I work online, but my sanity depends on it, too. Writing and Photoshop-ing is my best stress relievers. My life practically depends on it. @__@

When the electricity is there, we use these gadgets and what nots to our hearts desires, thinking later of the possible reflection to our monthly bills. When it is taken away due to natural disasters or even [knock on wood] terrorist induced, we feel like there is something lacking. Our means of communication to everyone else in the world is taken away as easy as it was handed to us by producers and marketeers.

There is much power in a keyboard for we look for it when it is momentarily taken away from us. We strive to talk with someone, even unconsciously for some. We have the inner dream to share what we think, hence the outburst of blogs and personal websites, group text messages and email blasts. We join online communities and egroups. We share messages far and wide. AND we don't even know we have that much power.

What power is this?

It is not just to share or inform others of what is new with you or even the latest trends you enjoy. This power is commonly called INFLUENCE.

Endings Lead to Beginnings

As cliche as it may sound, it is true that endings will eventually lead to new beginnings. A mellow song, a good novel, a long blog post, and even the movie of the year. Endings are everywhere and not just in any form of entertainment. There is also an end to fear, to pain, and to silence.

More than four years ago, I was admitted into the University under the program Organizational Communication. When the results of the exams came out, congratulations can be heard from every turn for a good week. I did not know that accomplishing a simple entrance exam would have rendered such reaction from these people. But I bloomed as well. My ego shoot straight to the roof.

Unfortunately, when the real hard work became an evident daily practice I realized that my ego might have shot straight up, but it got stuck on the roof. I did not know what Orgcom was. When I applied to the University, my first choice was Communication Arts like every body else in my class shared.

Little did I know what kind of transformation I have put myself into. It redefined a lot of words for me, like sleep, social life, time management, logos, photos, videos...

The redefinition brought me around in so much circles that one time I just had to stop and ask myself: is this what I really want?

With one more major subject and thesis completion hindering me from finally holding the title Graduate, I would say that I do want this. The communication field might not have been my first choice, at least not this angle of communication. But as I practice it in the "real world" just before I finish my degree, I got a clearer picture.

Being stuck on the roof was not the best ordeal, but it marked a new beginning--without even knowing it was some kind of an end. But here I am now, with sleep-deprived eye bags and stress-induced hair fall. Despite all that along with the sweat and tears, I love the challenge and the award after.